帮我改一下这篇托福作文,据说句子太繁琐而且用词简单.Thefriendsthatyoucanhavefunwitharemoreimportantthanthefriendsthatyoucangethelpfrom?Weareliveinagregarioussociety,relyingoncooperationtosustainourlif|小学作文问答-问答网

帮我改一下这篇托福作文,据说句子太繁琐而且用词简单.Thefriendsthatyoucanhavefunwitharemoreimportantthanthefriendsthatyoucangethelpfrom?Weareliveinagregarioussociety,relyingoncooperationtosustainourlif

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更新时间:2024-04-24 22:00:21

问题描述：

帮我改一下这篇托福作文,据说句子太繁琐而且用词简单.

Thefriendsthatyoucanhavefunwitharemoreimportantthanthefriendsthatyoucangethelpfrom?

Weareliveinagregarioussociety,relyingoncooperationtosustainourlife.Soeveryoneneedsfriends.Somefriendsarefunny;somefriendsarelike-minded;somefriendscanhelpyoualot;somefriendsareonlyfair-weatherfriend.Somepeopleholdstheideathatthefriendsthatyoucanhavefunwitharemoreimportantthanthefriendsthatyoucangethelpfrom.Bycontrast,inmyeyes,thefriendswhocanhelpyoualotaremuchmoresignificantthanthefriendswhocanmakeyoulaugh.Myreasonsarefollowing.

Thereisnodenyingthatthefriendsthatyoucanhavefunwithareessencialinyourlife.Youcanmakephonecalls,havepartiesorgoshoppingwiththem,abandonyourselvestofun.Buttheyareonlyfair-weatherfriends,whoareonlywithyouwheningoodconditions.Whenyouhavetofacesomedifficulties,theywillgiveyoutheairanddisappear.Let’stakethefamousmovie,theGreatGatsbywhichadaptedfromanovelofthesamenameforanexample.Whentheprotagonist,Gatsbywasrich,thereweresomanypeoplearoundhim,complimentinghissuccessandgenerosity,goingtohisluxurycastle-likevilatoattendhispartiesweeklyandhavingfunwithhim.Daisy,hisoldloverwhoalreadygotmarried,alsorebuilttherelationshipwithhim.However,whenGatsbygotboggeddownincrisis,thesefair-weatherfriendshaveallgoneandlefthimalone.DaisyalsodecidedtoabandonGatsby.Atlast,evenwhenGatsbydied,onlyfewpeoplecametohisfuneral.Atthattime,DaisywasoutforatriptoEuropewithherhusband.AllthesepeoplewerejustavariciousofGatsby’smoney,tendingtobasetheirrelationshiponGateby’sstatusandsuccess.

However,ontheonehead,everyone’sabilityandideasarelimited.Allofuswillmeetsomedifficultieswhichishardtodealwith.Sometimes,youhavetofacesomedelimmathatcannotbehandledbyyourselves.Atthattime,youwillfindhowimportantthefriendswhocangiveyouahandare.Theforceofapersonisextremelylimited,butifyouhavemanyfriendsthatyoucangethelpfrom,thenthepowerofanorganizationisinapproachable.Inthisway,youcangetoutofthemess,whichyoucannotexpecttogetfromthefair-weatherfriends.O

都思丹回答：

网友采纳

　　这么长!先改一段您试看,若满意,再继续. 　　Thefriendswithwhom(that)youcanhavefunaremoreimportantthanthefriendsfromwhomyoucangethelp? 　　Weareliving(live)inagregarioussociety,relyingoncooperationtomaintain(sustain)ourlife.So,everyoneneedsfriends.Somefriendsarefunny;somefriendsarelike-minded;somefriendscanhelpyoualot;somefriendsareonlyfair-weatherfriends.Somepeopleholdstheideathatthefriendswhomyoucanhavefunwitharemoreimportantthanthefriendswhomyoucangethelpfrom.Bycontrast,inmyeyes,thefriendswho(can)helpyoualotaremuchmoresignificantthanthefriendswhocanmakeyoulaugh.Myarguements(reasons)arefollowing.

高仁璟回答：

网友采纳

　　好的谢谢，可以继续改么？

都思丹回答：

网友采纳

　　可以，以后直接改了。下面是第二部分。Thisisnottodenythatthefriendswhomyoucanhavefunwithareessencialinyourlife.Youcancallthemforchattingorgossiping ,andhavepartiesorgoshoppingwiththem,whichmayabandonyourselvestofun,whiletheyarepossiblyonlyfair-weatherfriends,whomaydisappearonceyouhavedifficultiesorevenarenotingoodconditions.Whenyouhavetofacesomehardtimes,theywillgiveyoutheairandnolongershowup.Let’stakethefamousmovie,theGreatGatsby,asanexample, whichisadaptedfromanovelofthesamename.Whentheprotagonist,Gatsbywasrich,thereweresomanypeoplearoundhim,complimentinghissuccessandgenerosity,goingtohisluxurycastle-likevilatoattendhispartiesweeklyandhavingfunwithhim.Daisy,hisoldloverwhohadalreadygotmarried,alsomanagedtorebuildtherelationshipwithhim.

都思丹回答：

网友采纳

　　第三部分。However,whenGatsbygotboggeddownincrisis,allthesefair-weatherfriendshadgoneandlefthimalone.DaisyalsodecidedtogetawayfromGatsby.Atlast,evenatthemomentwhenGatsbydied,onlyfewpeoplecametohisfuneral.Atthatverytime,DaisywasoutforatriptoEuropewithherhusband.AllthesepeoplewerejustavariciousofGatsby’smoney,judgingtheirrelationshipsnobbishlyaccoringtoGateby’sstatusandsuccess.However,ontheonehand,everyone’sabilityandideasarelimited.Allofuswillmeetsomedifficultieshardtodealwith.Sometimes,youhavetofacesomedelimmathatcannotbehandledbyyourselves.Atthattime,youwillfindhowimportantthefriendswhocangiveyouahandare.Theforceofasinglepersonisreallyweak,butifyouhavemanyfriendswhomayprovideyoustrongsupport,thenthepoweryouwouldhavewillbeinapproachable,becauseisfromagroupofpeople,orevenaninformalorganization.

都思丹回答：

网友采纳

　　最后。Ontheotherhand,twoheadsarebetterthanonehead.Ifyouhavegenuinefriendsthatyoucantrustandgethelpfrom,youcanhelpeachotherandexchangeyourideas,bywhichyouwillbeabletoopenyourmindandmakeyourselfmorecreativeandthoughtful.Inconclusion,asfarasIamconcerned,thefriendswhoarehelpfularemoreimportantthanthefunnyones.Theywon’tabandonyouandleaveyoualonewhenyouareintrouble.Astheoldsayinggoes,afriendinneedisafriendindeed,thehelpfulfriendswillwithyounomattertheweatherisfairorbad.

都思丹回答：

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